As a spiritual leader, I see this all the time. Partners get together to avoid being lonely, and they settle time and again—either seeking to stop the desperation or longing for some inspiration to come from outside themselves.
A woman once said to me, “I am looking for a man who is into spiritual practices, who will want to come to church with me, who will enjoy being with my children, and who will benefit from loving my animals.”
The next time I saw her, I asked how it was going, and she was glad to share: she had met the love of her life and was going to run away with him. “Tell me about him,” I said. She told me that he is an atheist who doesn’t like children and is allergic to animals!
She ran away from herself long before she began to dream of running away with him. She is not awake. She is dying and is too blind to see it. How long will her sacrifices last? I wonder. I am sure they won’t last too long, since these qualities of his are totally out of alignment with the woman and her inner calling
After all the false pretenses, partners are actually surprised when they do not make it. Common sense is one of our most precious God ordained gifts.
When will we understand…
Being alone is about developing our inner sanctuary and establishing a true relationship with who we are and are becoming. Loneliness does not stem from the absence of another person; it comes from the absence of you—your true self.